azks

Poodles

2007-04-15T14:19:37Z

Just a random journal to make fun of Poodles and people that own them and dress them up. Or I can just rant about people that dress up any type of dog. Save it for Halloween I say....no dog needs a pink ribbon in their hair or little boots so there feet don't get wet in the rain?? Crazy and the purses they sell to hold these little cat like dogs in. I really don't think anyone needs to carry their dog in a purse to the store with them.

Anyway.......Ken it's your turn to talk about this subject....have fun!

Poem

2006-05-21T01:43:20Z

Her eyes are so sincere

Her mind is somewhere else

not here

Why does she choose to hide behind the mist

Why can't she remember all the times she brought me fear

I needed to feel the comfort

now my life is imcomplete

Its been ruined by broken promises

she didn't love me with all her heart

I feel I am walking on shattered glass

especially when I am lingering on the past

I can not feel it

sometimes if I strain I can hear it

I am wandering alone in the darkness

waiting for something to fill the emptiness

that lies within me

If I cannot trust her

how can I trust my own judgement

betrayed by my mother

betrayed by my father

and my lover

when will it all get better

She repeats the same actions

without colorful results

I want to conger up a spell

make her see the life she can have

if only she will take the little pills that balance her

Instead she laughs at them

crushing them and tossing them out

Just like she has done to me

the pill and my heart she treats no differently

I will take a hold of my life

I will hold my childrens hearts in a colorful light

high up where they wont be damaged in the forever mindless fight

No repeating....

the broken promises will not prevail

poem....unfinished

2006-05-21T00:55:10Z

I was walking in the sand when I saw him

The sky opened and began to stir

As the rain falls to his eyes

I get a glimpse into his soul

It tells a story of love once held

ripped away by stormy past

I think I remind him of a girl he used to hold

I want him to see its not me who betrayed him

I am free
I am whole
I'm not the one you used to know
with the broken soul

Take my hand
Trust in me
We can begin our new story

They shared laughs and picnics in the park

...with no worries

It was as if they were floating on a sun-filled cloud

The cloud soon turned to fury

She couldn't help feeling sad and lonely

She was sad but hid it under a filtered smile

I'm not her
I am free
I am the one you want and need
Please believe me

Take my hand
Come with me
We will begin a new Journey

Bad day

2006-05-05T17:45:01Z

I am having a bad day cuz Rick and I got in a fight

He called at 11:30am and said he just got out of work early today. Then he just sat there on the phone....nothing.....then Zavien asked him if he would play badmiton (tennis) with us and he said ok and I brought them over to Ricks tennis court. I was there for one min. and I started to tell him that after dinner at Lisa's that I would probably not bring them over until about 8:30pm, then he said "I am going out tonight, I told you that three days ago." I have no recollecting of this conversation and told him I didn't remeber that. He said I never listen when he talks and that made me mad. I said its no big deal because I didn't need to stay the night at Lisa's and that it was just something to do instead of being at home. Then he got all bitchy and was like, "you told me that Fridays were my night to go out since I have the kids all weekend" "but you probably dont remember that either....fine nevermind my life sucks anyway so I will just take them tonight and you go to Lisa's." SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO aggrivating cuz I have heard this a million times before, his poor me, just go ahead a do what You want then...crap. I said , "HELLO, I just said that me staying at Lisas was not a plan I need to keep it was just something to do and I am not trying to get you to keep the kids tonight at all" then he started saying Oh, now I have the kids Monday nights and Friday nights...like that means he does too much. Anyway, I told the kids we should go eat and he says, "Zavien I know your not hungry but we are all hungry...so lets go" then I told Rick that I did not want him to go with us to eat cuz I didnt want to spend my friday hanging with someone who is so negative and that he made me mad and I dont have to stay around him. So he got mad and said "I dont know why you are getting so angry" "Just go and I will keep the kids and make them lunch and Kalea can take her nap here" I said fine and left.

Its like we were talking about before, he got off work and instead of just asking to come get the kids he wants to all hang out like a happy family...that we aren't...when I just need some time to myself..hanging with him and the kids doesnt feel relaxing just irritating cuz I have to listen to his crappy life stories or we just dont talk at all. Then he thinks he is so helpful just for coming over and hanging with us.

So I decided again to write down how much they are with me and how much with them. This is what I found...........

Rick.........We are going to say that 9:00pm is bedtime

Friday 8:30pm-9:00 .30 mins.
Sat. All Day 7am-9pm 14hours
Sun. All Day 7am-9pm 14hours
Mon. at daycare then Ricks 3:30-9pm 5.30 hours
EQUALS 33.30 Hours

Angie..........

Tue. 7am-9pm
Wed. 7am-9pm
Thur. 7am-9pm
Fri. 7am-8:30pm
EQUALS 55.30 Hours

So I have them 20 more hours than him, and he did have them at Daycare last Sunday but I didn't count it..he has let me go to the tanning salon for 30mins. but the only other help is if he gets to hang out with us and I rather hang out with just the kids.

My last post

2006-04-23T13:56:42Z

I posted that song because on my way to work that is the song that was playing on 89.7 I thought, wow, cool lyrics...simple but straight forward.

azks @ 2006-04-23T07:59:00

2006-04-23T12:59:33Z

Butterfly Boucher

All the things I want to say but I can't
All the things I want to do but I won't
Hold me tight
Not too tight
I'm in knots and you tie me in bows
I feel pretty
I know that you care
You're so sweet
You're so so sweet

It's not a hurry tha we're in
It's the pollen
It's the spring

I can't make me love you
And you can't make me either
Patience Boy I need it
I can't make me love yooooooou

Oh oh oh

Paper pen and a piece of your heart
I can read it but where do I start?
What to do
What do I do?
An I am going but I'm gonna come back
And maybe then this maybe that
Hold me tight
Not too tight

It's not a hurry that were in
There's no problem
That's the thing!

But I can't make me love you
And you can't make me either
Patience Boy I need it
I can't make me love yooooooou

Oooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Everyday there's something new to hold onto toooooooooo a little more of yoooooooouu

I Can't make me love you
And you can't make me either
Patience Boy I need it
I can't make me love yooooooou
Patience Boy on strange days
I can't make me love yooooooooouu

Oh oh oh

I think this summerizes up my feelings and by talking last night with Ken I see that it's ok.

Crapola

2006-04-21T21:03:49Z

Well, I guess the sun can only help so much. I picked Zavien up from school and gave Rick a call to see if he called a babysitter for saturday since it is Tomorrow and he is so lazy. So I called and asked and he said "Well, you can call Brandi for me" I said "um....you can call her since I have the kids and you have had off work the last two days and have put it off til last minute." Then he was like "Fine, I guess Ill do it, I have to look for her number" I just said "Ok" and said Im gonna hang up now. Then I get home and feel like crap because I realize that this is really eating me up inside knowing that he hasnt seent the kids since Monday morning for a couple hours and he has had off work for two days and not once offered to help out or ask to see the kids. I feel like I am bending backwards and wearing myself thin just for him and his crappy job, but when he has any extra time he doesn't even think of me or the kids.
I saw that he was depressed the other night and decided to talk to him and then he goes on to say that he should just kill himself and make it look like an accident and then my life will be easier, he has said this many times but it still hurts to hear him say, "I will kill myself, make it look like an accident and then you and the kids will get my $100,000.00 life insurance and you can buy them everything they want and a new daddy" AHHHHHHHHHHH, I hate it! I actuality it would make my life better and I wouldn't have to put up with all his crap but the kids would not be happier and would grow up sad and no money could buy them a new daddy. He is such an asshole to think so selfishly because he feels worthless and doesnt want to do anything to change himself he just wants to cop-out and take the easy way out for himself.
I talked to my good friend Lisa about this and she thinks like other people do that he may just be saying this to make me feel sorry for him so I will not ask him for anything because he is so "fragile" and it is his excuse for not helping out. She was talking about my recent delema about wanting to move by my sister or anywhere. She pointed out that if I am staying here because I feel that it is helpful to have their dad around then I really need to look at the whole picture and write down the positive help I get from Rick and if it isn't much then I may be a lot better off living somewhere else to where Rick doesnt "Get To Me" plus while he was gone sure it was hard and a bit demanding but I did it and I didn't have Rick bringing me down or have any expectations of him helping out since he couldn't. If I lived away and had full costody I would get more help from him in the form of money and less Bogging down that he gives me every time he opens his mouth.
Anyway, I called him and told him nicely that I would appreciate some help since I have had no help the last couple months and I wont have any after next month when he leaves for 4 more months. He at first was all defensive and was like I have been helping out all week, I just said no, you havent, (he saw them for dinner last night for an hour after I talked him into going to IHOP with us and he went straight home after that. He only went for the food I think because I was paying and was happily on his way do sit at his place with a beer and no worries.) I just said ok, please hear this one sentance You have had off work the last two days and Tues, Wed didn't have to work until 2:30pm and when do you think the last time I had even a half hour to myself let alone a whole day? Then he was silent and I hung up on him since he was just wasting air time and I just wanted to let him know I was hurting. He called back and said sorry and that he understands and that he would come and get the kids for a couple hours from 3-5:30 since I wanted to take them to Lisa's with me, although if he would have taken them for the night I could do without going to Lisa's and being around 7 kids. But I will take what I can get and he told me that he has just been going through so much with his imaginary girlfreind that he hasn't been thinking straight. My life and the kids life shouldn't be all chaotic just because he is fighting with a girl he NEVER met. aHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

Anyway, I have a lot more to say but I am going to go take a hot shower and then go to the tanning place to have some sun therapy and be ready to have fun with the kids in at 5:30.

Hello

2006-04-21T19:07:07Z

I am so happy that it is Sunny out and the sun is there to brighten my day.

I feel so sad that Ken and I aren't together anymore, I wish I could feel the way he does and just try again. I know that I will never find anyone like him, I mean I felt so safe and loved when we were together. I miss all the good times and wish I could have them now but I feel that something deep inside me is fighting to keep him away. Maybe it is because I was walked on so many times that now I am like "hey, this is the final straw!" I really believe this is the right choice, not to be together, because I do not want to hurt him or get hurt and the only way for me to be sure this doesnt happen is to not be with him or anyone until I feel good...I mean REAL good in myself. Its like the blog I posted on Myspace...I cannot put my happiness in someone elses hands. I need to be filled with happiness to be content and then the happiness needs to be "overflowing" to give and accept from someone else's love and happiness...I know that you have to give with your "Overflow" so that you never have less than you need for yourself.

I don't want anyone to take me for granted and I feel like everyone has an ulterior motives for being with me or around me. I wish that everyones true feelings and thoughts were written on their shirts so I could see what the ulterior motive was. I know it's a negative way to think but its just for now at this moment when I feel vulnerable. That is a lot of the reason that I don't like to answer my phone, because the first thoughts that come to my head is either someone wants me to listen to their problems or they want something from me........I used to always give advice and listen to everyones problems but now that I have to take care of my own issues I feel overwhelmed to hear of others, or I think that their problem doesnt come close to mine. I know it sounds bad or rude but really I do have to take care of myself and my kids now. No extra stress.

Yes this is short and my not finish any of my thoughts but it'll have to do for now. I am not very good at expressing myself in email or journal form but I will try and maybe it will become easier as time goes on.

I have finally cut the umbilical cord from my mom and Rick.....

2005-10-29T22:15:52Z

I have finally taken control of my life and for the first time I am feeling very happy! I no longer have my mom bringing me down. She was finally confronted for the last time about all the things she has done to hurt me and she has decided not to change or take any responsibility for her actions. I am feeling real good about cutting all ties with her. She had an enormous hold on me that I didn't fully realize until now. I have spent so many nights worring about her and since I have no control over her it was useless. I was wasting my energy by letting her make me sad, mad, and worried. She never did anything for me or made me happy. I do not need anything from her and neither do Zavien or Kalea or my brother and sister. I can only hope that one day she will see that she has made bad decisions that affected everyone not only her. I hope she will let go of all the pain that she has, and become a happier person.

I also mentioned Rick is no longer holding me down or placing any additional stress on me, the only way that could finally happen is for me to see that it was me letting him bring me down. Once I saw the effects of not responding to any complaints I began to see that I was becoming happier and stronger. Not letting his negative comments bother me has lifted a huge weight off my shoulders. He can say pretty much anything and I immediatley say to myself, "This is not my problem". Wow, I have freedom from the two most hurtfull people in my life. I was a prisoner to them but no longer. I do not have to help them anymore, if they need something they need to figure it out or fix it themselves. They got into the mess They will need to get out of it without my help, because I have better things to do!

I am so happy to see that my life is now becoming more positive and clearer every day. With all my new breakthroughs I will have a bright future.

So, we meet again!

2005-10-28T22:37:22Z

Its been so long since I wrote a journal entry.........here goes! So much has changed since then, I am a different me, a better me.

Poem

2005-06-15T05:20:51Z

FEAR OF LOVE

I found ways to forget my lonliness
and in the process forgot who I was.
Like clear water clouded by the turbulence of tides,
fear became my guide while love seemed to be locked from my heart.

I covered my fears with layers of armor -
and while I did, I locked love out even more,
until I was afraid of love itself.

My shield became doing well and looking good
and being strong.
Yet how strong could I make an eggshell?
I began to break - and in the pieces I found, Him.

Quiz

2005-06-14T21:48:50Z

[] I am bisexual or homosexual.
[x] I've consumed alcohol.
[x] I've run away from home.
[x] I have lied to my parents about where I am.
[x] I listen to political music.
[] I collect comic books.
[x] I shut others out when I'm depressed.
[x] open up to others easily.
[] I am keeping a secret from the world
[x] I watch the news.
[] I own over 5 rap CDs
[] I own an iPod or MP3
[x] I own something from Hot Topic
[x] I love Disney Movies.
[] I am a sucker for hair/eyes
[] I don't kill bugs.
[] I curse regularly.
[] I paid for that cell phone ringtone.
[] I am a sports fanatic.
[] I have "x"s in my screen name.
[] I've slipped out a "lol" in a real conversation.
[] I love Spam.
[x] I bake well.
[] I would wear pajamas to school.
[] I own something from Abercrombie.
[x] I have a job.
[] I love Martha Stewart.
[] I am in love with love.
[] I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
[x] I am self conscious.
[x] like to laugh.
[] I smoke a pack a day.
[] I loved Go Ask Alice.
[] I have cough drops when I'm not sick.
[] I can't swallow pills.
[x] I eat fast food weekly.
[] I have many scars.
[x]I've been out of this country
[x] I believe in ghosts.
[x] I can't sleep if there is a spider in the room.
[x] I am really ticklish.
[] I see a therapist.
[] I love white chocolate.
[] I bite my nails.
[x] I am comfortable with being me.
[] I play computer games/video games.
[] I'm single
[] I'm in a myspace relationship
[x] Gotten lost in your city.
[x] Saw a shooting star
[x] Been to any other countries besides the united kingdom
[x] I Had a serious Surgery-
[] Gone out in public in your pajamas
[x] I have Kissed a Stranger
[x] Hugged a stranger
[x] Been in a fist fight
[] Been arrested
[] Laughed and had milk/coke come out of your nose
[x] Pushed all the buttons on an elevator
[] Made out in an elevator
[x] Swore at your parents
[] Kicked a guy where it hurts
[x] Been to a casino.
[] Been skydiving
[x] Broken a bone
[x] Skipped school
[x] Flashed someone
[x] Saw a therapist
[x] Done a split
[x] Played spin the bottle
[x] Gotten stitches
[] Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour
[] Bitten someone
[] Been to Niagara Falls
[x] Gotten the chicken pox
[x] Kissed a member of the same sex
[] Crashed into a friend's car
[] Been to Japan
[] Ridden in a taxi
[x] Shoplifted
[] Been fired
[x] Had feelings for someone who didnt have them back
[x] Stole something from your job
[x] Gone on a blind date
[x] Lied to a friend
[x] Had a crush on a teacher/sub
[] Celebrated mardi gras in New Orleans
[x] Been to Europe
[] Slept with a co-worker
[x] Been married
[] Gotten divorced
[x]Had children
[] Saw someone dying
[x] Driven over 400 miles in one day
[x] Been to Canada
[x] Been on a plane
[x] Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show
[] Thrown up in a bar
[x] Eaten Sushi.
[] Been snowboarding
[x] Been Skiing
[] Been Snowskating
[x] Met someone in person from the internet
[x] Been moshing at a rock show
[] Been to a moto cross show
[x] Gone to college
[x] Done hard drugs
[x] Taken painkillers
[x] Had someone cheat on you
[] Cheated on someone else
[x] Miss someone right now

TGIF

2005-06-03T13:54:51Z

Ha Ha I beat you to the punch! TGIF baby!

I love you! You know who you are! love, Angie

My sister..........

2005-06-02T19:31:27Z

My sister called last night and told me that she was pregnant! Yeah! I am going to be an auntie again! Now I will have three nieces and nephews, I have one niece Navaeha and one nephew Luis. My parents go crazy since all of their grandchildren have diffrent names, Luis has a spanish pronunciation that my parents can't say so they call him Lewis and Naveaha is Heaven spelled backwards with an "a" at the end and Zavien is all made up and Kalea is hawiian and they always miss-spell all of them!
Luisito is turning 1 on June 5th and now she has a new baby on the way! Wow, her and her husband are going to have their hands full! They will be less than 2 years apart! That is going to be a lot of diapers!! I am so happy for her! I know her husband Luis told me he wanted 8 kids. I think he will change his mind quick when they have two little ones! We'll see!

Six months.............going on 7

2005-06-01T19:29:05Z

Wow, Ken and I have made it to our 6 month annaversary. To everyone it may not seem too long but that is half a year and we have learned so much about eachother in that amount of time. The funny thing is we both were waiting for a phone call on our annaversary and didn't even end up seeing eachother that day. Well, it really wasn't that funny since I was sad and so was Ken. We finally talked and realized it was all miscommunication and that we are both crazy........Ha ha!

We definatley celebrated on Sunday which is a very special day that we should celebrate anyway since it was the first time..........that we looked at the stars together and he pursuaded me to lay on his bed and close my eyes in the dark........wow, and I actually did it (I am sooo nieve) and didn't slap this new guy I just met tryin to get me in his bed. LOL! Ken, I know you are laughing!!!! So we had a great day celebrating our 6 month annaversary to the stars and made up for all the time we have been missing, I really miss him! I know it won't always be this way, in that we hardly see eachother. Something will change and we will make it work! We Can Do It!!!!

I love you and will touch more on this subject after I take approx. 45 phone calls here at PayPal. Bye

Angie

I'm sitting at work...........not fun

2005-05-12T16:47:14Z

Why do we have to work so much? Yuck, if I was not here I would love to be curled up on the couch with some good music and good company (I wonder who I would choose?) Or since it is raining and if my good company was busy I would love be outside (yes in the rain) splashing with my kids in the puddles like we did this morning! Then go in for a nice hot cup of hot chocolate or cappiccino, ahhh, the life!

Relaxation store

2005-04-20T20:45:59Z

I am very excited because Ken and I are starting our own business via the internet my business name is going to be Lavender Dream, I want to sell massage oils, soaps, music, lavender products, books on relaxation and meditation, and more. It has been a dream of mine for a long time and now the great thing is that I have Ken for support which I never had before. I can start this business online, but my goal is also to start a real store, the atmosphere is what I really want. The online store won't have the customers sences going crazy like a real relaxing store does.

azks @ 2005-04-08T14:18:00

2005-04-08T19:32:49Z

1. Been kissed: well lets see i have 2 kids =)

2. Eaten sushi: Yes, it's pretty good depending on how it's put together

3. Gotten hyper: Yes, I do often

4. Been dumped: no, i do the dumping

4.b. dumped someone: yes

5. Eaten an entire pizza by yourself: noway

6. Been a rebel: I can say that I have (I don't want to write examples)

8. Gotten in a car accident:Yes, a lady ran into the back of my car, I also ran into a parked Mini-van on a snowy day!

9. ever liked someone older: Often

10. Seen the white house: no but I was in a cab and thought I would catch a glimse on my way to the airport.

11. Hiked a mountain: Yes, a few! The only in Arizona is where I got attacked by a cactus in my leg.........want to know more just email me!

13 Been in love: Yes

14. Made home made cookies (from scratch): The best! I like to beable to put as many chocolate chips in the cookies as I wish!

15. Cold or hot?: HOT, I am always cold

16. lace or satin?: Satin

17. New or old: New, but I don't really know what this question means, oh well.

18. Roses or daises: easy one,,,,,,,,,,dozen purple roses

19. Chocolate or Vanilla? chocolate always, how about Mint Chocolate Chip (ice cream)

20. Winter or fall: I am all about Spring

21. hard liquer or beer: I like Beer (Rolling Rock Green Light) or Kalua mixed drinks

GIRLS:

24. What do you like in Men? Good looks, Charm, Manners, and a caring soul

25. In shape & muscular or not: I want a little of both

26. Do you want a guy to take you out to a fancy place or have a romantic dinner at home: Fancy place then i don't have to do the dishes

27. Do you want your b/f to get you chocolate or
jewelry: Again, a little of both!!

GUYS: > >28. What do you like in girls:

29. Athletic or not: Does not matter, its whats in the heart the counts

30. Hard to get or easy:

NORMAL QUESTIONS >

31. who do you want to fool around with right now? My main squeeze for sure!

32. who is your funniest friend? Courtney

33. Who do you email the most: Ken

IN THE LAST 48 HOURS:

37. Had a serious talk: No

38. Hugged someone: everynight before they go to bed =)

39. kissed someone: yes all the time

40. loved someone ohhlala: yes, and i am not giving details

41. Fought with someone: Not my way to deal with things or people

42. Been depressed: Yes

RANDOM QUESTIONS
43. Do You Like to Walk in the Rain: Yes, if it's warm

44. Do you like the snow? NO, only watching it fall from the window inside

45. Ever had that falling dream: yes, They are the worst

46. What turns you on? not telling, i am related to some you people =)

47. What turns you off? Smelly odors

48 What do you dream about? Spooky dreams

49. Who is your favorite cartoon character?: Care Bears are mine

50. who is your favorite star: Britney Spears! Yeah right!

51. What is your favorite saying: It'll all work out! And try to believe it!

I am soooo tired........

2005-03-22T15:37:42Z

I spent my day off yesterday cleaning and sorting threw more crap from the old house. Not a fun way to relax before a long week of work. Is it friday already?

I miss Ken....

2005-03-17T22:33:24Z

I am so tired! Its is only 4:30 but I have been sleepy since 2:30. I need to get some rest tonight that is a must.

Moved in................

2005-03-15T22:35:19Z

I am so happy to have moved into my new apartment! I am so thankful to my friends that helped out on Saturday. Now I just need to do the last bits and pieces to finish the transition into my new place.

I met Ken's dad and stepmom on Sunday, they are really nice and we all had a great time at Chucky Cheese for Seth's 3rd birthday! Wow, three already they grow so fast, soon it will be his 23rd birthday before we know it!

I am so happy and in love! Ken really turns something on inside of me! I am crazy for him! Ken, I love you! love, Angie

Last night.........

2005-03-10T17:55:45Z

Ken came over and at first I gave him a bit of a scare, We came to an understanding on the situation. I felt awful only because I realized that I must have gave him this sinking feeling that I used to get when I would find things in my past relationship. I never want Ken to feel anything that I felt before. I am so in love with Ken that I would do anything for him and never hurt him. I know in my heart that he is going to treat me right too!
I know seeing someone that I had been with in the past is in the past. I don't like to have to tell someone bluntly that I do not like them and that we had nothing in common. I have no interest in seeing anyone that I dated because they all ended for good reasons and those chapters were closed.

I am Moving..............

2005-03-09T02:04:10Z

I am so excited to finally have my own place I have been waiting for this day since May of last year! Wow, has it really been that long ago since the split? That's cool, it is my time to start my new life over! I will get the keys to my three bedroom in Papillion on Thursday on my lunch break! I will be getting everyone together at my house on Saturday where I will have a truck (U Haul) ready to load. My dad came to visit and really helped me get my butt in gear and with Ken's help we packed up the house. I don't have much else to do for now, the main stuff is taken care of.
I am so happy to have a new begining and to have Ken in my life to share it all with!

I played hookie.............

2005-03-04T18:51:11Z

I am at Ken's house and waiting impatiently for him to get here for lunch, we were talking all night about how we aren't going to see eachother for a while. I was sick the last two times we were together and before that we had the kids. So I woke up this morning thinking I need to call in sick because seeing Ken is more important then my job! Well, it's almost 100% true, except Ken doesn't keep the money in my bank like PayPal does.

My dad (step dad) is coming today too! I have him at my house right now and he thinks I am at work but I am playing hookie and I will see him after I spend some alone time with Ken. My dad told me I didn't need to take off of work just because he is visiting but I felt it would be better this way!

I found some boxes and I definatly will need more! I can't believe I am moving in two weeks, but it's really only 6 days since that's all the time I have off of work to pack and move out. So it will be fast and hopefully smooth transition from one house to the next! I am so happy to be out of the old house, Rick always seemed to comfortable there and I was a bit too uncomfortable.

I love thinking about my own place and how I once the divorce starts, I can honestly tell myself that this was not as hard as I originally thought. I thought leaving Rick was going to be so hard, I remember when we were just dating I would think about breaking it off with him but it felt impossible. I really didn't want to loose someone else that was steady in my life because my parents weren't. I feel very confident that all the bad things in my past have turned into gold. Now I have the life that I deserve, a man that deserves me and that treats me right. We have beautiful kids and a great future ahead of us!

I am my own age..........

2005-02-25T22:22:15Z

You Are 25 Years Old

25

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.

13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.

20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.

30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!

40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?